The Pope Francis Effect: Why I’m Having a Tough Time

Pope Francis 2I have a confession. I’m having a tough time adjusting to Pope Francis.

I admit that I’m a B16 fan girl and I’m still getting over Pape Bene’s understandable departure. It’s like when your best friend moves far away and no matter how hard you try, you can’t help but compare all your other friends to him. Or when you’re at an extended family gathering and both your grandads are there and even though you respect both of them, you clearly prefer one over the other.

But it’s not just that. We can all agree that right after Pope Francis says something, articles, Youtube videos, and blog posts immediately appear trying to explain what he just said. It’s like he’s the relative that, whenever he speaks, we wonder if we heard correctly.  We’re all trying to interpret , clarify, justify or put our own spin on his statements. It can be frustrating trying to make sense of it all. What’s My Line: the Pope Francis Edition is really trendy right now and everyone from the stay-at-home mom blogger to Fr. Z has jumped on the bandwagon.

I’m not criticizing Pope Francis. He is who he is, tempered by life as he knows it, and to give him his due, he is the Holy Father of a church family of 1.2 billion people with diverse ideas, experiences, attitudes, and personalities. Like all extended families, there will always be tension and misunderstandings and he’s trying his best to steer the barque of Peter through some pretty rough seas while the rest of us quarrel. I wouldn’t want to be in his [not red] shoes. Would you?

A major part of my discomfort is the bickering that his statements cause among the Catholic family. My perception is that of a line drawn between those who are head-over-heels in love with him and those of us who are not as enthusiastic.

I’ve read articles, commentaries and Facebook posts that maintain a civilized, grown-up tone while debating his latest speeches and interviews. But then there are the comments that are less reasonable and seem to be on the attack, whether for or against Pope Francis. The worst ones are the rants and responses that clearly show a lack of basic understanding of Catholic doctrine and teachings. They are the ones that are impossible to discuss. They do the most harm and drive a wedge between family members.

I know I’m rambling but I’m sure I’m not alone in my thinking. I love our Catholic family even when we fail to act charitably towards each other. We’re big and colorful and imperfect but we do a lot of good both inside and outside the family circle. Because there are so many of us, it’s understandable that we won’t always agree but we ought to tone down the volume and at least try to keep an open mind. We ought to learn more about the family history and read up on what older family members have written over the past 2000 years so that when we have our spirited discussions, we’ll at least know what we’re talking about. Like all family histories, there’s the real one and the made-up one so we have to be very careful who we read and listen to.

The Catholic Church is my home. I’d like to believe that I would lay down my life to defend Her. And I really want to do the right thing by Her. But what is the right thing?

A wise friend pointed out that no matter what is going on around me, no one can stop me from doing my work and saying my prayers. So that’s what I’m going to do, for the sake of our Catholic family.

My work consists in loving my neighbor (which includes difficult family members and a Pontiff who is trying his best)  as myself. I don’t have to treat everyone like they’re my favorite brother or uncle or grandfather, but I have to respect them and recognize when to speak up and when to keep quiet.

And my prayer? I’m begging St. Joseph to look after Holy Mother Church and beseeching St. Michael the Archangel to defend Her. Most importantly, I’m taking the example of our Blessed Mother who teaches us the most valuable lesson in prayer. I’m holding on tight to her hand, hiding beneath her mantle and quietly, steadfastly and humbly repeating over and over again: “Thy Will be done.”


Terry McDermott blogs at http://8kidsandabusiness.wordpress.com.  She has been married for 27 years to a man of great integrity and is the proud, tired mom of 6 young men and 2 beautiful young women, ages 24 – 10. She enjoys being her parish’s First Communion catechist. She is a Registered Nurse and a nurse-entrepreneur owner of a nursing foot care business.  St. Joseph, St. Therese, St. Gianna, St. Monica and St. Camillus de Lellis are her go-to saints, along with Our Blessed Mother. She tries to live a life centered on the Gospel through prayer and service. In all things, she strives to be grateful to God and reminds herself daily that “everything is grace” (St.Therese).

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